Tonight I am up late… remembering. I love the power of memory as it intertwines with emotion to form a temporary reality. In quiet solitude, this gift of memory allows me to sit for awhile with my mother who passed away many years ago. It gives me glimpses into moments I will forever cherish and allows me to relive past experiences that define the meanings of my life. Tonight an open window in my mind has taken me back to a very special place where I learned a new meaning to the word “love”…
I am sitting in a white wooden rocking chair softened by blue cushions. The steady creak… creak…creak adds a rhythmical sense of peace to the room. As if in abstract harmony with this methodical creaking cadence, snuffling, gurgling, sucking noises emanate from the warm bundle wrapped in my arms. Above the white bottle, dark, liquid-brown eyes stare up at me. They pull me in and I find myself mesmerized with their innocent beauty. This is one of those moments that define who I am as a parent and father. The words to a poem written by Adrea Bocelli flow through my mind,
While like a giant, proud and happy,
I take my baby in my arms, fragile, innocent, and alive
And like a little bird he`s pushing against my chest
Abandoned, quiet and safe, for an instant, almost sweetly
My destiny appears to me like a dream
And I see myself, old and surrendered,
Seated there near the coal fire,
Waiting for the evening with the anxiety of a child,
Just to see him coming back home
With the gift of his smile, of his words and kindness
It`s like a promise that can solve the enormous joy
Of one of his caresses
Then I wake up and I have already forgotten
But inside of me the kid`s trapped soul advises me
That this new born child is already more important to me
than that of my own life….
Written by Andrea Bocelli
I am at peace with the world and I give thanks for this midnight dance with my little baby girl.
How I miss those splendid nights where weariness was overcome by love. How I long to hold that baby in my arms again… if just for a moment. How glad I am that I took advantage of those tender moments that sealed the bond of love that now softens my relationship with my daughter!
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