How High Did She Go?

Now that I think about it 30 years later, it was funny, but it wasn’t at the time. My first son had a hard time accepting the fact that he had to share his home with his little sister. When they were both very young my daughter came running into house screaming and crying. I asked her what was wrong, but she couldn’t speak. I interrogated her brother. He said that he took a board and put it across a log and told his sister to stand on one end. He then climbed on top of the dog house and jumped onto the other end of the board and she went flying. I was furious. I yelled at him and asked why he would do such a thing. He said, “But, you wouldn’t believe how high she went!”

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WE ARE AWESOME !!! A Tribute To Those Born Before the 80’s.

TO ALL THE KIDS WHO SURVIVED THE 1930s, ’40s, ’50s, ’60s and ’70s!!

First, we survived being born to mothers who may have smoked and/or drank while they were pregnant.

They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and didn’t get tested for diabetes.

Then, after that trauma, we were put to sleep on our tummies in baby cribs covered with bright colored lead-based paints.

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, locks on doors or cabinets, and, when we rode our bikes, we had baseball caps, not helmets, on our heads.

As infants and children, we would ride in cars with no car seats, no booster seats, no seat belts, no air bags, bald tires and sometimes no brakes.. « Continue reading »

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Inappropriate place and time

Beau was sitting next to John in church and turned to him and asked “dad, who laid Mary?”  Taken back John replied with “what are you talkin about?!!”  Beau responded with “well then who laid Adam?” at which point we discovered he sees humans as laying eggs just like chickens. …could this be an example as to why he is repeating Kindergarden?  LOL!!!!!

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Wuthering Heights

So my 9 year old daughter has a super high reading level.  Her school tested her and produced a list of books that would be appropriate for her level over the summer.  Among the list of books was Wuthering Heights, Jane Eyre, and Cry, the Beloved Country.  I naturally thought ‘no way’.  I took our book of complete works of Bronte and gave it to her and said “start with Wuthering Heights and let me know what your thoughts are”.  She did and told me that the book was like a dictionary and she had a hard time following the sentence structure.  I decided to read it aloud to her to see if it would help her understanding.

Hours later that day Bella turned to John, my husband, and asked “Dad, how big does a bitch get”?  Johns face was priceless.  I just cracked up laughing because the word is used correctly in Wuthering Heights and so Bella thought she would try to use it correctly as well.  We told her that bitches come in all sizes and it’s the big ones to beware of.

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Potty Talk

I believe it is important my kids talk about their body parts with the proper vernacular. So if you are offended by the word Penis don’t keep reading! I don’t however encourage them to speak about their body parts like they are a seperate part of their body that can think for its self. « Continue reading »

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